Tuesday, September 25, 2007
The best breasts (?)
In what I guess passes for peer-reviewed literature in the UK, a London surgeon has proclaimed to have identified the perfect breast. The model mammary has a nipple that points slightly up, and an upper breast pole just a bit smaller than the bottom half. Apparently UK surgeon, Dr. Patrick Mallucci, spent many hours "poring over photos of topless models in lads magazines and tabloid newspapers" to come up with this theory.
While observing the "ideal" (as defined by cultural norms) is an ok way to make some general observations about beauty, I'd take issue that "laddie mags" (STUFF, Maxim, etc....) and pornography are the best reference point. A disporportionate number of models in those mediums have had breast augmentations which changes your whole frame of reference for comparison. The ideal augmented breast should approach the ideal un-augmented breast, which most (don't flame me here) would point to as the symetric nulliparous (prior to childbearing) breast with little ptosis (droop) that possesses some degree of upper pole fullness. This is pretty much what Dr. Mallucci describes, but I take some contention to his methods and conclusions. Most women will never have this kind breast naturally, but "good" breast surgery can move someone closer to it. The ideal breast shouldn't be pointed to one that does not and cannot exist in nature, ie. Baywatch circa 1996.
Who has the "best breast" according to this doctor? The "why exactly am I famous again?" model/singer/personality, Caprice Bourret
And the worst? The world's most famous soccer mom, Victoria (Posh Spice) Beckham
I'd agree that Ms. Beckham's result isn't the best, but thin women have a hard time hiding all but the most modest implants. She would have done better with smaller and narrow implants, and would have been ideal for the anatomically-shaped gumy bear devices (form-stable high cohesive silicone gel devices like the Inamed 410 or Mentor CPG).
But picking 36 year-old Caprice Bourret as the best "natural" breast shape (as described by this doctor in the article)? She's got a classic over-sized, over-round result you get from big implants (again that Baywatch thing). She's claimed in the past not to have had extensive plastic surgery, but I find that implausible.
While it may in fact be a result that both earns Ms. Bourret a great deal of attention and be one that many women think they want, it's a setup for multiple future complications. That tissue just won't maintain that result for any length of time.